Jesus deliberately delayed two days so that Lazarus would die (John 11:6, 15), then wept. Isn’t weeping over a death you allowed for a demonstration a picture of a God who stages grief rather than shares it?

This is the hard reading of the chapter, and it should be faced. John says Jesus delayed so that the disciples would believe, and that he was deeply moved at the tomb, a word that implies anger as well as grief. The text presents both: a purpose behind the delay and genuine sorrow at what death does. The Christian reading is that this is the whole problem in miniature. God permits what he grieves, for the sake of a good that requires it, and does not pretend the grief is unreal. That is not comforting on its own; it is only comforting if the good is real and the death is undone, which is what the chapter goes on to show.